Idiosyncrasies

Some friends I haven’t heard from in a while have been asking me why I’m still single, trying to probe, trying to analyze "what’s wrong with me" and my "taste". Well, I’m just happy with how things are, is there anything wrong with that? I mean, who needs a boyfriend when you can just grab a chocolate bar and be just as happy? Who needs a boyfriend when you’re surrounded by your best friends? A boyfriend would be like… a friend with benefits, so to speak… and I don’t really need benefits like that anyway.
    
   
   
Erm… well, all those…. and for some reason, the guys I crush on tend to turn out gay - hey, they’re intelligent, creative, they speak well (I’m a sucker for guys with excellent grammar, a wide vocabulary and a great speaking voice to match…so shoot me), are always well-groomed, have great fashion sense…. plus they won’t hit on your friends (oh wait, I have more guy friends… maybe there is a slight danger there harhar).
   
   
Yeah, okay, so it’s partly "taste" ;P but I find that crushing on guys you know you can’t have is  a lot safer… you’re happy just to see ‘em, and you don’t have to expect anything more. You form this perfect image of them in your head, and are able to keep it that way.  I’d never try to get to know them, let alone talk to any of them because I’m sure I’d just be disappointed when I find out what they’re really like, right?

Dan tells me I shouldn’t be so friendly so I don’t attract assholes and other guys I wouldn’t be caught dead with (yet another glorious reason to stay single). Dan says I can avoid them by being more aloof and poised. If only guys could just take subtle hints (we do give subtle hints you know… but sometimes guys are so full of themselves that it you’d have to throw a brick at them before they get your drift) things would be so much easier.
   

Then again, this applies to us girls too… That got me thinking
   
   
In lieu of this… I dug up something I got in my e-mail a little while back.

THIS IS WHAT IT SHOULD LOOK LIKE, by Greg B.

One night I was drinking in a bar and flirting
with the bartender. I asked for her number. She said, "I don’t give out
my phone number because guys rarely call me when they say they’re going
to. My name is Lindsey Adams, and if you want to call me, find my phone
number." Which I did — the very next day. Do you know how many Lindsey
Adams there are in the phone book of a major city? Let’s just say I
talked to about eight or nine before I found mine.

1. An excuse is a polite rejection. Men are not afraid of "ruining the friendship."

2. Don’t get tricked into asking him out. If he likes you, he’ll do the asking.

3. If you can find him, then he can find you. If he wants to find you, he will.

4. Just because you like to lead doesn’t mean he wants to dance. Some traditions are born of nature and last through time for a reason.

5. Men don’t forget how much they like you. So put down the phone.

6. He’s just not into you if he’s not calling you. Men know how to use the phone.

7. You are good enough to be asked out.

8. Busy is another word for "asshole" Asshole is another word for they guy you’re dating

9. He’s got the ultimate situation: a great friend with all the benefits of a girlfriend, whom he can see or not see whenever he wants to. He may be one of your closest friends, but I’m sorry to say, as a boyfriend, he’s not into you.

10. If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay.

11. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.

12. Stop trying to change yourselves for a relationship that’s not meant to be.

13. Don’t stay because you think "it will get better." You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.

14. You cannot change a man’s behavior. Change comes from within.

15. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.

Greg B. is one of the authors of "He’s Just Not
That Into You" - a little self-help book to help a woman decipher if a
guy likes her or not. Do we really need this? The rules of male
behavior seem simple enough. If anyone needs a self-help book,
I’d say the men need it to decode us women, dontchathink? Hahaha!

Now, if we women were to compile "SHE’S Just Not That Into YOU" pointers… what would we put in it? Would we all agree on the tell-tale signs?  I have a feeling we wouldn’t… There’s bound to be a contradiction for each…

 
   
Something like…

1. She’s not that into you if she turns you down when you first ask her out

 
… but then again, she could be into you if she turns you down at first - she’s playing hard to get, as "The Rules"  tell her to do…but don’t be fooled, this is a ploy to get you to chase after her because she really likes you!
   
… but then again, she could be the straightforward type, in which case no really does mean NO.

   
 
2. She’s not into you if she doesn’t dress up for you.

 
… but then again, women dress up to gain the approval of other women, not men, right?
 
… but then again, if a girl likes a guy, she’ll want to look stunning
 
… but then again, if she can dress comfortably around you (no achey high heels and tiis-ganda little numbers), it means you’ve got a pretty good chance
 
… but then again… hay, this could go on forever!

   
3. She’s not that into you if she doesn’t introduce you to her family.
 
… but then again, maybe she’s still building you up?
 
… but then again, maybe she really likes you… but has a feeling they won’t approve…and is simply taking matters into her own hands?
         
   
We’re full of contradictions and operate on a case to case basis, don’t we?  What would you put? How do you show a guy you’re just not that into him?
 
   
   
Any thoughts? Hehehehe, let’s have some fun!
   
   
It’s great…being so diverse, isn’t it? Let’s revel in our
differences… and celebrate the fact that men go nuts just trying to understand what makes us tick. Hahaha!

Here’s what I believe: Once you find your WHY, you can overcome any HOW. Getting what you want then boils down to a fragment of WHEN.

I have my reasons, and I’m currently struggling to overcome my hurdles… so now… I’m just waiting for the right time I guess…when everything finally pays off.

I signed up for a Freestyle Football competition the past weekend - and as it turned out, I was the only female in the bunch. Part of me wanted to bolt after seeing how good everyone else was. I mean, these boys had been kicking footballs since they could walk! And me? Heck, I couldn’t even juggle with my feet until three months ago! How’s that for sucky?
   

I guess I’m just not used to competing when I know I don’t have a rat’s ass of a chance! Harhar! It’s a good thing Leo (thanks, dude!) reminded me of my WHY - I just love football. I’d do anything for it - I even resigned from a job because it would’ve made me give up the one day a week that I get to play! Incredibly passionate or incredibly stupid? I don’t really care.
   

And as for the HOW…well, so what if I lacked the experience? I had to gain experience somehow, and since the sport came into my life quite late - I’ve lost enough time as it is! Hence, it came down to a now or never decision. My head was screaming now! Now! Now! But my nerves were another story. They were bent on a big fat NEVER - I was shaking so much! I had never felt my feet and legs shake before. You’d think after being comfortable singing on stage, you can kiss your stage fright good-bye. But noooo, I could feel my feet quivering while I tried juggling!
 
 

Last hurdle? What could I possibly do that they couldn’t, or didn’t think of doing at least?! I couldn’t think of anything that would make my basic moves even a tad bit entertaining. And then, just one minute before going on stage, it came to me - I remembered most boys have trouble with splits. I myself never could do the darn thing as a kid… I just learned it this year! I did a split while in a neckstall - amazingly, I pulled it off even though I hadn’t practiced it before then. To my horror, Leo dubbed it the "Mystica move" - Eeeeewwwww! Never thought of it that way!
 

And as for the ‘when’… I don’t know how or why, but I qualified for the finals! I was sooooo shocked! Eager to learn some new tricks, I was up most of the night (and morning) practicing. When I woke up finals day, I had a fever. Murphy just loves picking on me, doesn’t he?
 

I didn’t win anything, but I’m still psyched! Everything went almost too well for me. I learned to balance the ball on my head, roll it down to kiss it, then roll it back up - two hours before the finals - and I pulled it off when it was my turn! My rainbow had an arc and went the right way, and I was able to do two splits while in neckstall - dunno what they’re called, but did one with my legs spread apart sideways, and one with one leg stretched in front of me. I think I heard some people go "Whooah!" as I was executing it, and that sooo made my day. Weeeeeeee! How’s that for lucky?!
 

So here’s to spontaniety!
 

Here’s to trying anything and everything!
 

Here’s to choosing fight instead of flight every time - glad to know I’m keeping my New Year’s resolution for the second year in a row
 

And of course, here’s to football! I love it sooo much, and someday, I just know it’ll love me back. Hahaha! Practice! Practice!

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"Only those who risk going too far can possibly find out how far they can go." - T.S. Eliot